please hear me out - this goes by faster than you’d think - it is a most important thing
Pathways to Renewal: Harnessing Neuroplasticity and Holistic Practices in Schizophrenia Recovery
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My subconscious lies, still in bursts to steer me, and then pulls me back out. You can’t be ashamed about the delusion dips.
At first it lied the most. You cannot ask it questions unless you are actively a balanced feather and get true answers. I was when I asked about the end, to my estimation, and when I write the best.
It lied a lot at first but told me to fight, not be told lies, and trust my heart. I listened to that because my heart rang true.
It’s about the fearlessness to be wrong over again, again, etc.
There is no shame at Daphne’s Hometree, because everyone comes knowing its delusion we’re working out until they’ve solidified/let the takeover win/made peace enough with their body and trauma/or whatever.
Schizophrenics need to hold the penrose of what could actually be true from all they feel until they prove it out. You can’t just tell them it’s all crazy. You say ‘this is delusion you’re working through but your body is speaking.’
‘You listen. What is it telling you?’
Rinse. Repeat.
I’m down to just finding a place in the world and getting a hug and then I’m an angel for the rest of my life. Affection from another would make me way better and able to hold over easier.
But there is a one that matters most to my trauma; Daphne’s only love, to her understanding of the word. She went thinking about them, in that part of mind.
I’d always cry to see them, no matter how cool my people become or how much time passes. It’s not a replaceable hug for my unique unbecoming. It would make me turn to mush for seeing their face and have them share compassion for my loss. I’ve never wanted a melt more. It’ll save my whole life gone forward from continued heartache.
I’d never be scared again.
