The Justiceers - Part Five: Chapter Nine
the next chapter from my forthcoming novel
The Justiceers
Part Three: The Will to Choose
Part Four: Prefinished Business
Part Five: Chrysalis
5.9
Arthur Katrinus knew he was changing, healing, and becoming something greater than he’d ever been before. He could feel that by more than just his functional legs, or that sense of Godhood which had bloomed within upon the raid of Persephone Station and now found a kind of muted stabilization inside him, this was about Grammaton, like for-real for-real.
It wasn’t all the times Miriam told him this, those repetitions of the message that he was tied to this planet in most fundamental ways, he had known this in his gut since he first arrived. Something about this planet had called him here to save it, there was an entire lifetime of struggle he’d lived just for this, and Arthur was going to be finding out why very soon. Really, quite extraordinarily soon — like nowish — or maybe just a little father down.
Arthur reads all these by the way, in real-time as we’re navigating all that’s happening in Yemi, if you couldn’t already tell by the way I’m constantly fucking with him.
He’d been used to picking through the projected distortions of blindness which had been present in Miriam’s words so long, he assumed there was some kind of metaphor that wasn’t based in reality when she’d talk about his transformation being so linked to this great planet at first.
Arthur was beginning to realize he’d been wrong about that, uncovering those parts of himself which had always known this.
Miriam had been getting her shit quite-remarkably in line with reality, what was coming through her now was purer than anything she’d ever written before. It was in fact this approaching nexus point which had been bringing all the clarity out of her. She’d always had a channel to some innate intelligence of most supported and loving consciousness, which empowered her to share its light, and had been her greatest support through those many times she’d find herself with no other beside her.
Yet, this woman was clearer than she’d ever found herself before, and perhaps, than she would ever be again. He was searching for his trust, not able to believe the most bold claims which came through, but he needed to find it.
Arthur was obsessed with the facts of Grammaton’s crumbling surface structures and those building signs of more tumultuousness to come. He knew that it was his job to help this somehow, to keep people safe, and get things back on track for the people of Yemi with his time here.
He was right; as per usual, with most things.
However, he’d been quite focused on the wrong parts of this crisis, becoming absorbed in the ebbs and flows of the very people creating the worst of it through their intent to exploit Grammaton herself and her most vulnerable citizens.
Arthur was meant to help the people here, quite literally, and his guidance would and had already helped many people survive. That was his purpose at this time, to help people get through this most insanely challenging stretch.
He’d forgotten something though; he needed to make it too.
Taking care of himself had always been a challenge for Arthur. Finding it so much easier to focus his manifestations of peaceful space onto those others who were lucky enough to find their safety an important matter to him, not including his own heart in that equation one bit, nor the people who reside within its most precious spaces.
That just hurt too badly to deal with, so he’d focus on those people who society was letting down the most, and pretend that to do anything else was selfish, believing a lie he’d tell himself; that he’d been the only one navigating this situation correctly.
He was being selfish and didn’t even know it.
Using the truth of importance in helping people through this time, realizing that portion of his purpose quite thoroughly, while abandoning the things which would feel most difficult to him.
He actually thought this was taking care of himself. Which is understandable, but wrong. The way to take care of others best, and yourself, is with love which is most holistically honest about what’s needed.
The soul of Arthur Katrinus was always fighting this battle, learning from this very struggle, and feeling shame for the way he’d let himself down in it all; the way he let other people down who meant most to him in those hidden spaces he’d so not wish to look.
There really was no reason for his guilt, because that man’s intentions for living were more beautiful than anyone else’s. No matter how he might disappoint his own heart, or love itself sometimes, the universe and his Goddess saw the endless perfection that was within him always. The Goddess finding great reflection in their own shortcomings of selflessness, the way they’d feel so compelled to do the complete opposite and spend all of their energy on purest self-exploration and healing.
It was almost as if there was some kind of divine balance needed between the two — like these people were meant to bring that out of each other.
However, the true ways of The Goddess would seem mighty foolish way to spend your energy to the man, despite the reverence he felt for her more distorted representations, and he’d not see what his own heart and body were calling so desperately for him to do; rest in healing love of Grammaton so provided to him by his Scribe.
She was just as connected to this planet as him.
Miriam and Arthur, while being born of other planets, were home here in Yemi, and even more so upon this planet. Time is not real from a higher perspective, you must remember. Their connection to this planet had been with them all along, just as Miriam’s detached visages of darkness and light had always been with her.
Once things are out in there time, backwards or forwards, they can be felt and live within people. Though, most often, the beings of this universe don’t realize what their touching when they see or sense these sights and emotions. Ever still, they guide us towards them, those soul-perceived moments of such importance to come.
Always aware of this from her loudest speaking heart, from those constant receptions of most extreme love and pain she’d hold in all her time, there was no doubt within Miriam that things would turn out for the best somehow. She could feel that out ahead, it’s why she was able to hold such optimism in the face of it all, this was meant to help her shine the way.
Yet she’d always been incredibly stumped by one thing.
Her own life had been led by these knowings of what was to come. The very feelings her actions in the future brought to being, drew her towards creating them.
‘What the fuck came first?’ is what she would always wonder.
Cosmic chicken an egg scenario right there. I’m not going to tell you though, and Daphne is not happy about that one bit.
In Yemi, where things matter to this story, the entire system had become engulfed in those most transformative energies of Grammaton’s heart-light. It was not just changing the planet and Arthur; everything would be touched by this most divine healing of evolution.
He’d just been obsessing over that damn cube which I’d gassed him up about, not ever knowing why I had — focused entirely on what could be inside, the horrors it might bring, that way it felt like it was speaking to him or calling somehow — there wasn’t much room for else in his life right now because of this complete overtaking within his mind.
It’s almost as if evil itself was in that box. That it hid in there and was taunting people with its malevolent and unknowable presence, twisting them against themselves by the way its projected energies would drag them into fear.
There was a devil — the soul of evil in this galaxy.
It was the ultimate source of spirit for both within those pairs of dark Justiceers — Carrigan Marks was made of this purest darkness, a most twisted consciousness of self-gratification and exploitation, stowed long within physical containers of powerful emanation throughout the history of this cosmos’ physical reality. Arks, that kind of thing.
Most unseen and corruptive challenges would be wrought by the presence of these objects so placed into the universe bearing mortal horror.
The way this darkness was levied against so many at a soul level, was an example of the duality which does exist in the universe, and a reflection of the way Justiceers are an expressions of The Great Light itself.
Arthur had become obsessed with the very thing he hated the most, and it was bleeding into him, making him turn against himself by its impact on his consciousness. This world and its technologies of manipulation had been absorbed quite deeply upon his time on Grammaton, in fact, a lot of these things were what Miriam’s light from Learo were actually helping with. His legs coming back, and his longed stowed tension only just beginning to release, were really just a bonus.
There was an evil which had become a part of the very structures of this civilization so built upon its suggestions. A whole world guided by their darkest urges placed inside them from this force, lost to the ways of The Great Light, hearing a voice quite clearly inside themselves and coming to trust it. Unknowing it was the last thing from a friend, or themselves, or their own mind as most of them thought it to be.
Evil had found its way into Arthur Katrinus, just as it had into Miriam Halafax, and Grammaton itself.
His transformation, which he would soon come to believe quite fully was most in-tune with Grammaton’s own healing as so told through his Scribe, would rid this evil from within him. The purity of his soul would shine again, and the light which Miriam had always seen so incredibly clearly, that peace which she so desperately needed to find her own.
It would reach everyone; this had been written.
