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REGARDING THE 14 and how I hyped myself up to deliver a letter while breaking my kundalini open in a waking vision that spoke metaphor of things to come. I left the Diablo 4 menu screen hanging open and got into it after a quick set of journaled instructions warning me to be careful. I just got going hard on blue lotus tea and smoking it too. I’d just come out an abusive relationship with a dumb Killing Eve boy. Eve is just a boy. They didn’t even know what they were doing with that character because our societal dysfunction runs so deep. It was exploring how a person presenting psychotic behavior could be healed or more inside. Because trans men get fucked out of existence and it makes monster-people-sweethearts. They’re my favorite kinds of people……
These are the people I’m supposed to be with. They’re my equal. Their minds are fucked by societal expectations to betray themselves, for themselves, on superficial notions serving others, and I cannot blame them for how impossible the weight of misogyny is upon a spirit of trans masculinity.
I throw boy words hard for a reason. I don’t aim to misgender. I poke. My stories are all written by Miriam, you know. Figure it out — that’s what I’m begging people to do. I always bring it back to some awareness of the gender fallacy. It’s all false historical social construction. It’s real in some people so that’s real. But it’s bullshit too so it’s bullshit. It’s both.
My people. My community. They are locked in a cage of families of Hera and Zeus.
This one was a drunk but still hot. I don’t think I’d become a crystal goddess yet.
This was my hype:
